MMMM. A tasty night of snacks, an awesome night of crafts, and a spectacular night of music! Vegan en Vogue's Kiss My Sass was all of this and more! 


^^^We painted these. ^^^

I think my fave part was the no-sew bow ties, but I was also a big fan of the paint stencils on pint glasses. 

Happy Year of the Snake, y’all.

Stay egnimatic,




Kiss My Sass: A Night of Music + Speedcrafting

mini bow ties, fabric flowers, stenciled glasses, puzzle pieces, and more.
deer pile 

Get your vegan craft on up in this piece!

Source: veganenvogue

Being both a biologist and a vegan, it doubly bugs FloNo when people say that vegans care more about “animals” than humans. Humans are animals, you guys, and we care about them all. 

It does not make sense to use one-third of our arable land to produce animal feed when eating animal foods has a much greater environmental impact. Because eating animal foods is such an inefficient use of resources, veganism is a food justice and human rights issue.

She wrote this blog post on the importance of incorporating global social justice into vegan life. QVLOCs just can’t help being intersectional. Your thoughts on the matter are very welcome.


So our roommate Amyrillis is a SOLOC, which, if you are not the best at acronyms, means Straight Omnivore Lady of Culture. Though a SOLOC, she has started to embrace vegan foods and cooking as both “an adventure and a challenge.” We had straight omnivorous company tonight and she decided to adapt a jambalaya recipe to make it palatable for her QVLOC roomies. 

Amyrillis successfully queer veganized the meal, though the conversation, less so. Two of our guests worked in wedding photography and the third was a pastor, so inevitably the conversation turned to Amyrillis’ dating life on Oh Hey Cupid and the most hilarious/cute/beautiful weddings and children the dinner party had ever seen. FloNo and Honeybee decided it would probably be best to keep on the down low our (and M-cakes’) enormous ladygayfaces. We avoided any mentions of dating/weddings and left out the specifics of how we met: at lesbian brunch. Instead, we suavely and synchronously answered “at … brunch” and smiled to the anecdotes of bridezillas and ceremonial brooms, while eyeball-messaging each other for more wine. Granted, our guests were kind people and it would have been of no import whether we are queers or not, but sometimes a QVLOC wants to eat some jambo in peace without being grilled on her sexual history and offered a blind date with every lesbian in Greater Metro Denver. Is that so much to ask? Though being a straight person anthropologist for a night is dreadfully captivating. 

Can’t Deny Ya Vegan Jambalaya
       by Amyrillis 

- 1 cup instant pearl barley
- 4 cups water
- 2 bay leaves
- 3 onions, diced
- 2 celery stalks, chopped
- 2 green and 1 red bell pepper 
- 3 cloves garlic
- 1 Tbsp. canola oil 
- 2 large cans diced tomatoes 
- 1 large can red kidney beans
- 2 small cans white beans
- 1 tsp cayenne
- 2 tsp oregano
- 1/4 tsp sage 
- Salt and pepper to taste

Rinse barley under cold water. Place in a large pot with the water and bay leaves. Bring to a boil and then reduce heat to low and cover. Let cook until barley is tender and water is absorbed, about 30 minutes, then drain and set aside. 

In the same large pot, heat the oil. Add onions, celery, pepper, and garlic. Cook until soft, about 5 minutes. Add tomatoes and juice then bring to a simmer. Add beans and spices. Stir to combine and then cover and reduce heat. Cook at a low simmer for about 15 minutes. 

Add the cooked barley to the mixture, stirring to combine. If necessary, add more water or veggie broth. Cook on a low heat for about 10 minutes. Remove from heat and remove bay leaves.  

Serve with salad and wine and vegan sourdough and vegan pumpkin ice cream from Sweet Action (or don’t, but that’s what we did). Feeds seven human animals thoroughly, with leftovers. 


Today was Food Day, a national celebration of real foods that are sustainable, affordable, and healthy. All over the United States, events were held to educate Americans with cooking classes, documentary screenings, and food tastings.

Even the Senator participated. 

FloNo attended a hands-on fermentation class at Denver Botanic Gardens taught by Milan Doshi, owner of both Queen Anne Bed and Breakfast and Five Points Fermentation Co.

Fermenting. LIKE A BOSS.

Now, let us to the sauering so that you may “witness a magical vegetable transformation.” To make sauerkraut, slice cabbage to a texture you like. (For a fun Ukrainian twist, add shredded carrot!) Then place the cabbage in a large bowl and salt it thoroughly with sea salt. Once the cabbage starts to glisten, take the glistening mass and place it in a glass or clay crock. Weigh it down with a washed root vegetable (or something) until all of the cabbage is submerged under the brine. Cover the vessel with a cheezecloth or, if you don’t want your house to smell like briny, briny funk, a lid. Let sit for weeks. Eat. If our recipe wasn’t specific enough, though we can’t imagine how that is possible, you may want to check out Wild Fermentation’s recipe for sauerkraut

FloNo: Fermentation is all about cultures. It’s like you don’t know anything. It’s like you majored in Linguistics. [Editor’s Note: She did.]
Honeybee: … 
FloNo: They don’t call us Queer Vegan Ladies of Culture for nothing. 
Honeybee: *exasperated sigh*  [Ed.: She did not approve this message.] 

FloNo and Honeybee ready for a day of fermentation.

In other fermenty news, Five Points Fermentation is developing a soy-free tempeh made entirely from local Colorado garbanzo beans.

Stay probiotic



FloNo hasn’t cut her hair in about a year and a half. Though she looks bangin with her current ‘do, she has found that there is an inversely proportional relationship between hair length and lady lovin’. Luckily, she has an appointment with Andrea the Vegan Hairstylist at Rebel Salon to remedy this most egregious situation. She is still trying to decide which Alternative Lifestyle Haircut (ALH) she should get because the possibilities are endless! 

Maybe this one? 

You’re welcome. 

It’s odd how hair can affect the way we’re viewed in the world. FloNo’s ALH will, for better or for worse, help her read as queer, but should that necessarily be the case? Some ladies who like ladies, like Honeybee, prefer their long luscious locks and don’t necessarily believe that cutting one’s hair should be a stage in the coming-out process. In an ideal world, people would choose a particular hairstyle because they liked the way it looked, not because they deemed it necessary to attract the attention of other queers. People would flirt with/ask out the people they were attracted to, and be politely declined if the attraction wasn’t mutual. Unfortunately, that doesn’t happen right now because being mistakenly identified as gay is often seen in a very negative light. Even self-identified allies can have subconscious, internalized homophobia. So we try and ID other queermos surreptitiously by means of outward cues, like clothing, conversation topics, and hairstyle to avoid potential conflict. While this does contribute to invisibility, it does keep us safe. So, for now, we may be left to “read the clues,” but we’ll fight the good fight for equality, understanding, and inclusion so this no longer has to occur.

Whip your hair back and forth, 



HILARIOUS. We are doing all of these things RIGHT NOW.


ulatLGBTQ* Comedy and Sketch Programs

Lesbian Sex Hotline - The Big Gay Sketch Show

Source: theslowpokewell

FloNo and Honeybee are both out of town. FloNo is attending her alma mater’s homecoming and Honeybee is livin’ it up with Charby and the Senator in Utah. 


Stay intrepid, 



Aside from being another glorious day of Vegan MoFo, it is also National Coming Out Day today. As you may know, gentle reader, FloNo and Honeybee are big ol’ queermos. But before we get into gay stuff, let’s talk about being vegan.

Before FloNo revealed herself as vegan to her family, she called herself vegetarian even though that’s not what she really felt. She didn’t eat eggs or dairy and had no intention of wearing murder. She did tell them eventually, and it ended up being not that bad. Sometimes that happens. Sometimes it doesn’t. But you can’t eat a lie, just as you can’t get your hopes up by expecting Portia de Rossi to appear on your couch with kale mints after telling people you are a QVperson. VegNews has a great article about people who are involved in both queer and vegan activism, making some connections but noting the differences between these two identities. 

In terms of coming out as LGBTQIAA, however you do it is fine, in person, over the phone, in the car, text message, or Google Chat.

                 Honeybee: true
8:20 AM    oh, I’m a lesbian
                 so there’s that
                 Straight friend: well that’s news.
                 Honeybee: it is

Thank you 21st century. And caring friend. 

So do it if you can and it’s safe; if not, that’s okay, too. We love you regardless. We were born this gay. Honeybee was mackin’ on the ladiez at six. FloNo waited til 4th grade. 

She was a late bloomer. 

At any rate, we’re generally out and happy. See you next NCOD (or tomorrow, whichever happens first).

Stay honest, 



Vegan grub often seeks to imitate the omninosh by way of super-processed faux-meat burgers, hot dogs, sausages, cheese, and ice cream. Sure, some of those processed foods can be helpful during the transition process, but after one’s been eating vegan for a while, the meaty cheesy eggy mess just doesn’t appeal anymore. We have developed a penchant for recognizable plant foods because we are herbivorous. Real plants taste better. Fact. Plus, veggie dogs are rather phallic, which we QVLOCs tend to find problematic

Lies, ketchupy ketchupy lies. 

But there is a more practical reason for not eating meat lookalikes. Recently, Momma FloNo went to the omnivorous restaurant where she ordered Gardein unfried chicken. This is a vegan dish, but the kitchen messed up. Momma FloNo  ate couple bites before realizing her order was incorrect and she was in fact served animal chicken. Of course, the chef was very apologetic, offering free dessert and a gift card to goad them back, but that was beside the point. For vegans, our choice to not consume animals goes further than not putting animal flesh into our mouths. We are trying to reduce total meat consumption overall, and a restaurant serving a vegan guest meat by accident, even if they fix it later, interferes with that mission because there is flesh on their plate. 

Some newer meat analog companies are apparently so convincing that they fool even the most stalwart omnivores. It’s enough to freak a QVLOC out. We are suspicious ladygays, us QVLOCs, and sometimes the only way to make sure that real meat isn’t masquerading as fake meat is to stick to grains, not brains

Stay herbivorous,